Healthy snacking

When life gets stressful, it’s important to manage your health and nutrition. I recently started working from home more often. Not actually working from home, per se, but I’m home more often so I can focus on my rigorous studies, training to be the next Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman.  When you don’t have coworkers around you and small, measurable workplace goals, it’s harder to keep yourself motivated and on task.

I’ve found that a well-timed, healthful snack is extremely important in my home productivity. It’s essential to ensure your snacks have whole grains and protein, which is why I swapped out half of the flour for whole wheat and kept the eggs in this recipe for cookie dough.

I like to have my first snack of the morning with coffee, after I’ve watched a few episodes of Dr. Quinn, taking detailed notes.

Healthy morning
You can see that there is a box of deck screws behind the eggs. That’s because I have other hobbies that I may or may not choose to share with you. How about you get off my back about it?

By mid-afternoon, I find that my energy levels are subsiding, so I make sure to have some healthful green tea (full of antioxidants and just a little jolt of caffeine), along with some sensible whole grains and protein

healthy afternoon snack
I just couldn’t resist the photogenic nibble while my tea was brewing!

Now, by the time evening rolls around, I start to really drag. I’m going to be honest, every now and then I get an intense sugar craving, but sugar is so bad for you! So, I usually drink some sparkling water with a nice snack, chock full of fiber, protein, and healthy fats!

healthy evening snack
I make my own sparking water with reusable CO2 containers, it’s much healthier for the environment and me!

Happy, healthy snacking, everyone!

Serafina

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Self-care in the Caribbean 

Sorry my post is late, but I am currently in the Caribbean and did not calculate the time change correctly. Plus, I don’t even know what day it is. Ever. 

When I looked into the mirror last week, I was incredibly disappointed in the way I looked. Ugly is too kind a word. I can’t believe Annie hasn’t filed for divorce yet, though he’s been suspiciously googling lawyers lately. 

I’m sorry you are about to see some disturbing photos.

I decided to take a trip to the Caribbean for some self care / #treatyoself time. 

I couldn’t even manage a smile in this picture. My hair lost its sheen, and my skin was terribly broken out that I couldn’t even hide it with makeup.

I left for the red eye immediately.  I didn’t even buy a plane ticket or make plans beforehand, or actually even tell Annie. He will find out if he reads this post because I also forgot my phone and underwear so I bought both at the airport. 

The beach was amazing. It wasn’t a nude beach but I still was naked the entire time.

It wasn’t just the change of scenery that was rejuvenating. My body also needed a cleansing so I make sure to only consume high grade alcohols and I sweat out the toxins when I drunkedly ran the beach trying to find my tour guide. It was spiritual. 

As for my skin? I felt that wearing a charcoal mask for the majority of the time was effective. 

There are toxins in your eyeballs and teeth too, so don’t skimp on the mask in those areas.

All in all, the trip has been a success. I’ll be heading home in about three months I think. 

Maybe it’s just because I brushed my hair but I look amazing now.

Next time I’ll share a healthy recipe to heal your toxic shit body too. 

Me and my tour guide, Nathan.

That guy isn’t Spock, 
Mary Ellen 

How to be Better at Everything than Martha Fucking Stewart

(Growing, Cutting, and Arranging Flowers for Everyday Enjoyment)

When I was born, my parents considered naming my Martha Stewart, but they we worried about the effect that my success would have on the original Martha Stewart. They eventually chose to stick with our family name, Berafina, and go with my biblical first name (we are devout theoretical Quakers).

It took many years for me to finally accept my natural superiority at the domestic arts. My staunch Vegan-Texas-Stripper brand of feminism often clashed with my natural proclivities, but I learned to integrate the two after a deeply spiritual experience in a vegan leather bondage shop.

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The potted flowers here are impatiens, which I originally planted after misreading the name.

I moved into my current homestead several years ago. My initial experiments with raised beds were met with limited success, mostly due combination of chickens and no fencing. This year we tilled a garden patch and built a fence to keep the chickens out. I focused mostly on vegetables, but I made sure to include a few flowers to brighten up the immaculately designed garden patch.

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You can see how I expertly planted a 3 ft tall marigold bush in between my step stones. It’s advisable to only garden if you are very good at balancing on one foot while not crushing any squash vines.

Almost any long-stemmed flower lends itself well to cutting. Some of the varieties in my garden include daffodils, irises, lavender, black-eyed Susan, Gerber daisies, zinnias, dahlias, sunflowers, and marigolds.

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Marigolds actually smell pretty bad, so I can’t totally recommend them for decorative use unless you have a really bad sense of smell.

You can see here that I have the flowers cut long enough for their container. I also recommend arranging them in an aesthetically appealing manner.

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You don’t have to have an “ugly side” of your flower arrangement. Unless you cut some zinnias before you actually looked at the dahlias and said “fuck it, good enough”

 

Every rose has its thorn

Serafina

I Don’t Know How to Make BibimBap 

But I tried anyway. 

And I’ll do it again! 

I think this dish is trendy around where I used to live, because it was advertised everywhere. I never looked into it until quite recently, when I decided my lazy stir frys were boring and stupid and I just couldn’t handle any more soy sauce rice at that moment. You can tell by how eloquently I speak about food that I’m incredibly cultured, and have tasted the finer things in life. 

I was also inspired by the egg rice battle that I temporarily had with Serafina on the blog, and technically this counts because it has rice and eggs. 

[Warning: I’m talking out of my ass]  Traditionally, this dish can be made to order in a hot stone bowl, which helps cook the raw egg, possibly the raw meat, and it crisps up the rice. I don’t have these materials or skills, so this is the lazy white girl version. If you listen to kpop or watch kdramas while making it, it enhances the flavors and spices and helps compensate around 30% for the fact you’re not a Korean grandmother. 

BibimBap (adapted clunkily from My Korean Kitchen)



Ingredients:

  • Vegetables (I used a combination of fresh and frozen, including a julienned carrot)
  • 4oz ground beef 
  • Meat sauce (from the My Korean Kitchen blog) 
  • Gochujang sauce (from the other blog, seriously, you need to get the recipe there I’m lazy) 
  • Rice (I used brown rice) 
  • A fried egg per person
  • Sesame seeds
  • Seaweed
  • Sesame oil
  • Vinegar (I used rice vinegar) 
  • Rice bran oil
  • Sugar, both brown and regular 
  • Minced garlic (I just used some from a jar) 

Directions: 



I couldn’t find toasted sesame seeds so I toasted some myself, like a homesteader.



Make up the meat sauce and marinate the beef with it while you work. This took my three hours because I got distracted and had to change poopy diapers and do other things equally exciting. Also make up the BibimBap sauce. 

In case you needed to see what gochujang is, because I didn’t know, and my choices are limited in my town.
Legit the first time I’ve used this since I bought it a few years ago.

Prep the vegetables, whatever that might entail. I didn’t do much. I sautéed some frozen stir fry with oil and salt, and julienned a carrot. I did not cook the carrot because I wanted a fresh crunch to the dish. I also sliced up the seaweed. 

Here are vegetables.
The product I used is a Korean product according to the package, making it authentic as hell.

Cook the beef, assemble the bowls with the rice and lay out the vegetables in a pretty way. Top with a fried egg and sprinkle with toasted sesame seeds, and drizzle with the sauce. I did not use raw meat or egg because I’m a coward and I would probably kill myself with food poisoning. 

I do not have bowls appropriate for this dish. I made a huge mess.

 

Maybe it’s because I’m a badass, but I didn’t think the sauce was that spicy, and loved it so much. It was only enough for two people in my opinion. Same with the beef. And I used a ton of vegetables. This is why I’m fat. 

I hope this inspires you to try and create your own BibimBap masterpiece. 

Always read the comment section,
Mary Ellen